Northern Lights

One of my boyhood friends and I were discussing the church as kids. He summarized the whole topic for himself by saying, “Even if it’s not true, it’s a helluva good lifestyle.” (Yes, he really used those words. Potty mouth.) I thought that was ridiculous, since I’ve always been an idealist when it comes to Truth with a capital T. On the other hand, I can see the benefits of the lifestyle in a lot of ways. For your trouble you get better health than most other demographics, longer life, more education, often a great work ethic, public speaking skills… and the list could go on. Unfortunately, the appeal of the “church lifestyle” drops dramatically when one achieves a high enough personal awareness of same-sex preference. Suddenly, knowing it’s true is the only thing that could persuade me to steer my life the way the church requires.

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Megan and her same-sex attracted husband have been married since April of 2006. They don’t have any children yet, but according to her, “it won’t be too much longer.” If you don’t know Megan (and even if you do), this interview is your chance to hear what she has to say about marriage, communication, religion, and sex.

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I will shortly be posting the first of ten interviews that I am conducting with straight women and men who are (or were) married to gay men and women. Before I do, I wanted to mention a few things:

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A link to this was included in the November Newsletter posting, but since the comments on the previous thread turned toward discussion on loneliness and isolation, I thought I’d re-post a link to something I recently wrote for North Star that’s related:

“It Is Not Good That the Man Should Be Alone”: The Virtues of Community and Friendship

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I was recently reading an old discussion over Elders Oaks and Wickman’s interview with LDS Public Affairs, and someone quoted the following from Elder Wickman:

“The good news for somebody who is struggling with same-gender attraction is this: 1) It is that ‘I’m not stuck with it forever.’ It’s just now. Admittedly, for each one of us, it’s hard to look beyond the ‘now’ sometimes. But nonetheless, if you see mortality as now, it’s only during this season. 2) If I can keep myself worthy here, if I can be true to gospel commandments, if I can keep covenants that I have made, the blessings of exaltation and eternal life that Heavenly Father holds out to all of His children apply to me. Every blessing — including eternal marriage — is and will be mine in due course.”

One woman responded:

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In a recent USA Today op-ed, Gary J. Gates explores how “Gay demographics could reshape [the] electoral landscape.” He begins with changing attitudes in America, recounting a recent Desperate Housewives episode, discussed here (since they reference “gay Mormons”), where Susan finally realizes her new neighbors are gay, and exclaims, “Oh, that’s super! Yeah, I’ve seen a lot of cable, so I get it. You’re just great.”

As part of Gate’s discussion, he even brings in Utah and BYU into the mix, stating:

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I’m no physicist. But I do like physics.

Some of the theoretical physics they skimmed back in college left me pretty darn confused, but also marveling. I have only a very vague idea of quantum mechanics, for example. I think the general idea is that the exact nature of certain particles isn’t precisely known; we describe it mathematically as a composite of all the possibilities, weighted appropriately for probability.

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Nothing this guy wrote surprises me (and most of it is uncompelling in the logical sense), but I’m glad he’s getting the drama he craves. ;-)

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It’s likely not a secret that I really dislike the labels gay, straight, homo, hetero, etc. I think they’re too simplistic and, thus, unhelpful when trying to have a meaningful conversation about what same-sex attractions mean for one’s life, and how s/he might best respond within a Christian faith life. I could even make an argument that to identify as or use any of them in any context other than superficially (and even superficial use has spiritual danger) is antithetical to the gospel of Jesus Christ. At some point, I’d really like to explore this in more depth, but for now, I’ll be brief (sort of).

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The latest Mormon Matters podcast is discussing Same-Sex Marriage and Mormonism

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